Addison and I walked into the very large bathroom at Fred Meyer per her request to go potty.
The second we entered the bathroom this conversation began.
Mind you the bathroom has 8 other ladies in it.
"Mom. That lady POOPED."
"Mom. That lady is POOPING IN THERE!"
"Mom. Someone's POOPING!!!"
A couple of the women started to snicker as I quietly told Addison to shut her embarassing trap.
We made it to the very last stall and shut the door.
"Mama! There's POOP in my BUTT!"
I told her that she needed to use her inside voice as I listened to the ladies in the restroom laugh just a little bit louder.
"Don't look at me while I POOP MOM!"
I turned around and covered my eyes.
(she really doesn't like anyone one watching her "do the deed")
As loud as humanly possible I listened to her groan the ENTIRE time she was doing her business.
Upon completion she loudly declared...
"Mom. I pooped out my BUTT! You WIPE MY BUTT MOM! YOU WIPE IT!!!"
The ladies were howling.
I was frantically cleaning the child and trying to get out of there before she said anything more embarassing.
Without fail, my lovely toddler drove the last nail into my embarassment coffin.
"Mama. If you poop, don't forget to wipe your butt and your 'gina."
She threw open the stall door and proudly exited the bathroom.
One pound lighter and with a red faced Mom.
All eight ladies had stayed for the duration of my childs fecal and vocal performance.
"Oh, she's cute!"
I don't think I've ever exited a Fred Meyer faster.